Old Hag

Old Hag

It appeared on social media

LinkedIn, to be exact

What I had - and he wanted - was a one-word domain name.

He had made a seductive offer, big bucks (his power, his right

His enti



I was meant for menopause, considered a deficiency disease in the 1930's, to be treated with testicular juice. (1)

It was a juicy offer.

I spoke to other artists, friends, IT consultants, attorneys.

I turned him down. I had the temerity to say No. It was, after all, my legacy. What would prevent him from using the domain for terrorism, porn, money laundering?

Surely the earth shook and the heavens shuddered.

Even the Supremes must have shuddered, since they just decreed that, in this land, "all of its women and girls have now been, by Court decree, declared official second citizens with no rights to their own bodies". (2)

Let alone a mind of their own.

We were not in the Constitution, Whoopi reminded us. We were not even people in the constitution. (3)

For 6 months I was bombarded with similar offers, most of which I rejected until finally I stopped replying.

I clearly was mis-informed.

Bro's know

That women are born to grovel

Shovel praise

Down their ego. (4)


I would capitulate.

His much-anguished fury reminded me of Richard Lederer's "Anguished English":

"The human body is composed of three parts: The Brainium, the Borax, and the Abominable Cavity. The Brainium contains the brain. The Borax contains the lungs, the liver, and the living things. The Abominable Cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five: A, E, I, O, and U." (5)

Old Hag

2 words meant to make me squirm

Like a worm

To remind me of my place

Merely a feMALE

In the huMAN race.

As Robin Coste Lewis recounted,

"The world sits on the edge of God's razor.

And every day

Every day

He shaves his fat face." (6)

I made it razor sharp

Clear to his ear

And to any other Dude

Who boils my coils


Means No

Means unequivocably




Perhaps his toxic words

Caused the gods to bawl in despair

Tear out their hair.

But me?

I think he's just a corn pone

While I

I'm jubilation to a T my friends

I'm jubilation to a T. (7)

c. Corinne Whitaker 2022

(1) Menopause and Menopausal Age

(2)) Michael Moore

(3) Whoopi Goldberg

(4) Corinne Whitaker, "Bully Bully Bang Bang"

(5)Richard Lederer

(6) Robin Coste Lewis

(7) Jubilation T. Cornpone, lyrics by Stubby Kaye in the play "L'il Abner"